Touchdown!!!

So, it's been a while. But once you read my story, you'll agree that it was well worth it. But first things first...

To catch some of you up with my life: I did not pass the Virginia Bar Exam on the first go around, so I get the joy of taking it once more. This time I'll be taking it at the end of February 2008 in Norfolk, Virginia. I have, however, started a temporary job which should last another 2-4 weeks. It's with a firm in downtown D.C., and it's just a contract attorney position for which I'm doing document review (translation: I read hundreds of pages of documents a day and decide if our client has to turn them over to the other side or not. translation #2: boring as H-E-double hockey stick).

But that's enough "catching up." Now on to the entire reason I'm back at the blogging.

This job I've started is very tiring, particularly on my eyes. Further, it requires such concentration that when I get up from my desk my brain instantaneously turns into mush. I get that whole "glazed-over" look and, while I'm able to accomplish basic tasks, I don't really realize what I'm doing.

Today, around 11:00 AM, my 2 cups of coffee and 2 bottled waters had caught up with my bladder, thus necessitating a trip to the men's room. I entered, and noticed there was an individual seated in one of toilet stalls. Not really much of a shocker when you consider it's a bathroom. Anyway, I couldn't see anything but his shoes, and it didn't really matter. I finished my task and washed my hands (I've got the hygiene thing down pat). As I stood, drying my hands with paper towels, the guy in the can let a massive rip. I'm talking an explosion like one you'd expect from an elephant. This was definitely one that I would've bragged about for a week or so.

Regardless, back to the story. I was brain dead at that moment...didn't really have consciousness about where I was. So, the guy rips one loudly ... and what did I do? You'll never guess it. I raised my hands slightly and proclaimed, in a moderately loud voice, "Touchdown!"

Yes ... that's right. A guy farted and I said "Touchdown!" I instantly snapped back to reality, and bolted out of the bathroom. The next 10 minutes were spent trying to conceal my laughter as coughs. I know there's no way the guy knows it was me...he was seated, plus the only people I know thus far were still sitting near my desk.

In anycase, I'm proposing a new "man law." Anytime somebody rips a solid, healthy fart in your presence, you are required to raise both arms above your head and exclaim: "Touchdown!"